i don't live in the ghetto but...
our house has been robbed twice, my car has been robbed once, and we just heard 4 gunshots followed by a car peeling out...
anyway, as some of you know i have a new car after my old trustworthy camry died in the middle of a busy intersection last spring. now i drive an old acura integra of unknown age. List of current problems with the new car:
1. The brakes shudder occasionally
2. There are a series of cracks in the windshield propagating across the width of the car
3. The car gets stuck in park. Sometimes the wait is 15 seconds, sometimes 3 minutes
4. When the gas tank gets low on fuel, the pressure builds in the tank and the car refuses to start unless you depressurize the tank by unscrewing the gas cap.
5. There is a short circuit in the engine and a fan turns on in the middle of winter to cool down the car, while the car is off, until the battery runs out.
6. Sometimes the automatic seat belt doesn't release tension and just tries to strangle you.
7. The back seat is covered in chain grease.
8. Rust.
9. The vents spit out fine to medium sized particles at passengers.
10. Sometimes the front driver's side tire goes flat.
11. The driver's side door lock doesn't work from the outside.
12. The headlights are so dim I only feel comfortable driving at night when there's a full moon.
13. The key pretty much always refuses to come out of the ignition when the car is cold. Sometimes the wait is two minutes, sometimes 20. Sometimes I don't know how long the wait is because I just leave the car with the key stuck in the ignition, doors unlocked, hoping someone will steal it.
That's pretty much it. As long as I bring along my portable charger, I can feel reasonably sure that I'll make it home. If not I can always walk, as long as it's not further than uptown of course.
Ed
our house has been robbed twice, my car has been robbed once, and we just heard 4 gunshots followed by a car peeling out...
anyway, as some of you know i have a new car after my old trustworthy camry died in the middle of a busy intersection last spring. now i drive an old acura integra of unknown age. List of current problems with the new car:
1. The brakes shudder occasionally
2. There are a series of cracks in the windshield propagating across the width of the car
3. The car gets stuck in park. Sometimes the wait is 15 seconds, sometimes 3 minutes
4. When the gas tank gets low on fuel, the pressure builds in the tank and the car refuses to start unless you depressurize the tank by unscrewing the gas cap.
5. There is a short circuit in the engine and a fan turns on in the middle of winter to cool down the car, while the car is off, until the battery runs out.
6. Sometimes the automatic seat belt doesn't release tension and just tries to strangle you.
7. The back seat is covered in chain grease.
8. Rust.
9. The vents spit out fine to medium sized particles at passengers.
10. Sometimes the front driver's side tire goes flat.
11. The driver's side door lock doesn't work from the outside.
12. The headlights are so dim I only feel comfortable driving at night when there's a full moon.
13. The key pretty much always refuses to come out of the ignition when the car is cold. Sometimes the wait is two minutes, sometimes 20. Sometimes I don't know how long the wait is because I just leave the car with the key stuck in the ignition, doors unlocked, hoping someone will steal it.
That's pretty much it. As long as I bring along my portable charger, I can feel reasonably sure that I'll make it home. If not I can always walk, as long as it's not further than uptown of course.
Ed
posted by where's my ed? at 9:38 PM
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